Getting My Mojo Back...
Why haven’t I been around? Because I’ve gained about 15 lbs. and my jeans are tight, my ass got big and I don’t feel very good about myself these days. I ask myself why it happened? Why did I put on the weight? Why did I gain back weight I tried so hard to lose?
I lost my perspective and I got too comfortable.
I stopped tracking my food because it took too much time and I stopped weighing myself because I didn’t think I needed to. I kept going to the gym, but not as regularly and I loosened up my regimen because I wanted to be more flexible and easygoing. Unfortunately, that also meant buying sweets that I know are my trigger foods, which is always a big mistake.
It’s funny, when I’m at the grocery store, I’ll pick up a bag of chocolate and this little voice in my head says ‘Gail, put it down, you don’t need it, you don’t want it.’ Months ago, I would have listened to myself and put it back on the shelf. But lately, I’ve been ignoring that little voice. I buy the chocolate rationalizing that it’s for Robby or my daughter - or even just to have around in case someone stops by. At the end of the day - the chocolate is my go to for stress eating and as I shove them into my mouth I wonder why I bought them in the first place. Sometimes I don’t even taste them.
I tried on a pair of jeans I bought a few months ago and they’re tight. Really tight - like so tight that I have to lie on the bed to get them closed tight. Not good.
While I laid there feeling like a cross between a blueberry muffin and a sausage, I felt like crying, but I didn’t. I got pissed.
I literally worked my ass off to lose over 100 lbs. only to let myself go - AGAIN. While I only gained a small fraction of the weight back, if I continue on this path, I know that I will eventually gain it all back + more.
I know this, because I’ve been on this path before and I’m not going to allow it to go any further.
“Nothing tastes as good as being thin feels.” I saw that quote somewhere years ago and it resonated with me. It’s true. The chocolate (code name for any trigger food, really) isn’t worth the feeling that I get when I slide into a smaller size or look at myself when I am at my target weight.
So, here’s what I am going to do….I’m getting my mojo back!
I’m clearing the house of any sugary sweet foods. If my family wants to keep them, then they have to keep them away from me.
I’m going to work at most 9 hours per day - I’m going to get back into the habit of going to bed earlier so I can get up and hit the gym 5 days per week at 5:30 AM and do my classes + my misc. faves like rowing, stair climbing and lifting weights
I’m going to make more time for friends and loved ones. I’ve been so busy with work that I’ve been exhausted at the end of the day and too tired to socialize. I haven’t seen my book club or pokeno buddies in months and I miss them! I haven’t hung out with my besties in SO LONG! It’s time to reconnect!
I’m going to journal - online. I’m going to share my activities through this blog, connecting often (daily, if I can) so that I can capture this journey and share it with you.
I need to spend more time as HealthyMommaBee and a bit less time as Gail the workaholic.
What’s my goal? Obviously to take off the weight I put on, but I also want to finally get to my goal. So, I want to lose 40 lbs. Robby and I are going on a cruise in December and I’d like to hit that goal by December 1st. I’m pretty confident that I can knock off 6 lbs. per month over the next 7 months.
If you want to take the journey with me…tap into my mojo and come along. It’s going to be a great ride!
Bee healthy. Bee happy.